Yesterday I turned 24 :) It was a wonderfully lazy and relaxed day, filled with so much love and I felt so lucky and blessed all day.
(*Right - my goofy birthday face. I was so happy all day!)


Jon also made a delicious black bean taco pizza for dinner which was super yummy- it was a crust from scratch, black bean base, then my homemade nacho cheese, lettuce, tomato, homemade salsa and crispy tortilla shreds sprinkled on top. I am so grateful to have a boyfriend who's so good in the kitchen :) I was also gifted a vitamix!!! It came in the day before and I was so excited that I made salsa, hummus, and ice cream with it all in one day. Clearly the Susie homemaker in me came out full force, haha!

(*Right - the delicious pizza made by my wonderful loverboy. Below - my new vitamix!)

I feel like each year comes with certain
responsibilities and certain lessons to be learned. I was reluctant to leave 23 behind because it was such a dramatic year of challenges and experiences, but I know the year ahead of me is going to be incredibly fulfilling. After a few years of feeling like I was flailing for answers (there really should be post-collage classes on how to be an adult/ what to expect from life after collage) I feel like I'm on a path that is going towards what I really want and what I really need for myself. There are no questions about whether I'm making the right decisions, it's just a matter of when I make them. It's a really good feeling.

But back to what this blog is actually about! The past two days of yoga have been soooooo much fun! I've hit a place in my practice where I feel really comfortable, and it starts from a simple physical movement. Breathing. But not just breathing- really breathing. Breathing calmly, deeply- with patience and with trust. Breathing as if each bit of oxygen that's coming in is full of love and you want to soak up every tiny molecule, and breathing out to make space for all the relaxation and comfort you're striving for in your body. Since that blazing hot class last Friday I've truly discovered how to keep my mind and my breath calm, and to let the movements do all the work. I no longer feel as much struggle, and I really feel as though I'm moving through a meditation.

It's as if the past few years of my practice I've had a collar around my neck and my lungs, holding them in just slightly to the point where it's hard for me to breathe. I've never had an easy time breathing, even in gym classes in junior high and high school. Smoking for several years certainly didn't help, but after I quit three years ago it took a really long time to notice a difference.

These past few days though it's as if I've never taken in a full breath before, and I can keep it steady even when my heart is beating like crazy. It gives this automatic feeling of control and peace throughout the body, because the breath in my opinion is the strongest physical way to access your inner power. When you are breathing you're alive, and if you can breathe calmly under duress then you are proving your strength to yourself and building your power simultaneously. The yoga teachers say it all the time "breathe, just breathe, breathe calmly" but it's different when you hear it and you thinking you're doing it versus actually doing it and knowing you're doing it right.

As for my inversion practice- I didn't do much of it yesterday- I pretty much just played around on the roof! However, between my eka pada rajapotasana, chakrasana, and hollow back practice I really have been noticing an opening in my shoulders- and wow what a difference that makes!


New things are happening in my practice and it's so exciting!! I just keep hoping for each day to be a good day, going in with no expectations, and trying my best to be as open as I can, and not just in class. And on that note we'll see what today/tonight brings!

(* it was an incredibly beautiful weekend- a view from my favorite yoga spot <3)

Throughout my experience in yoga practice I have learned many things about myself and about exercise, and one of the most important of those lessons is has been that rest is just as important as the actual movement. It's similar to writing- editing is 50% of the work. Well in yoga, rest is 50% of the growth.

It took me a while to learn this. When I first started bikram I was so thirsty for a cleansing that I wouldn't stop. I couldn't stop. Not only was I going 3 times a week (which was a huge jump from doing absolutely none at all) but I was also biking all over the place. It was summer time and I can't even fathom how much sweat I dropped in those 5 months. I would wake up in the morning and just go go go- bike to work, stand on my feet all day, bike home, bike to yoga, eat, sleep, and repeat. There was down time, but it wasn't conscious down time. I clearly needed a change, and I grabbed it the second it came to me, but since I was not giving my body the rest it needed all the work eventually took it's toll on me. I remember there were days when I would wake up and think "I really don't want to go to yoga today- I'm so tired…" but I would go anyway. I got burnt out pretty quickly.

So after time away from the heated room, I began to slowly and naturally ease my way back into my hot practice, and this time around I can feel a dramatic difference. In between classes I allow major resting time. I rest not only for my body, but also my mind. I take calming showers, I make sure to eat fulfilling, nurturing food, and I give myself little treats here and there as little gifts. I listen to what my body is asking for, which is the best thing I think I can do. There is no torture involved, and there is no excessive pushing to do more than I can. I can feel myself getting stronger, more balanced, and more confident with each day- I can see it and feel it in my practice.



Rest is not being lazy or sluggish, and it's not a time to complain or criticize yourself for what you're not doing. It takes just as much consciousness and care as the physical exercise and it is active. It's the time you have to reflect on all the work you're doing and surrender to all the incredible benefits of that work. There is no growth in constant work- that's just robotic. But there is growth in reflective work, and without the down time we wouldn't be able to see just how far we've come since we started our journey.

And on that note, I have to say I got the some of the best sleep of my life last night, and I'm so ready to start into my second week of the 30 day challenge tonight! Between today and yesterday I feel like I've been giving myself a lot of free/fun/fluid time to do whatever I'm craving to do, which of course ends up with me playing around in poses/ in the kitchen/ with crafts :P My inversion challenge progression pictures are shown above (working on stag leg balances this week- and my handstand was held for a full 5 seconds today!!) and a few other things I got to do this weekend!

( *to the right- a strawberry + blueberry pie & a few apple turnovers | below my third tangram coaster - just one more to go!)

The awesome thing about this 30 day challenge is that I'm pushing myself to try out new classes and teachers that I haven't tried before. It's only been one week but I already feel like I've experienced a real variety of classes, which is so beneficial to not only my practice but also to my own gathering of teaching observations. Granted I'm only sticking to yoga- I could definitely also try any of the pilates, pole dancing, or other movement classes, but for now at least I feel like I'm getting a lot of education with just the yoga.
    















(*I didn't get a lot of pics, but here are a few early ones of my my man by the grill just before we really got it going, and some good friends having a good time.)

I think the Hot Fusion class is my new favorite class. It's just challenging enough without being too exhausting, and I leave feeling like I got just what I needed. That's exactly what yesterday's class was, and it was the perfect way to start the day before our long hot bbq park adventure (which was a blast!). Not to mention hot yoga is definitely the best way to prep for a blazing 90 something degree weather day like yesterday- I swear I can mentally manage the heat so much better.

Physically though, the heat might be getting to me. Today I'm feeling pretty damn tired, and I think between the long days in the sun this week and the early rising every morning I've gotten a little worn. So today I'm allowing myself to recuperate and relax alllll day - no pressure to do anything… except I still need to get my inversion in for the day! Yesterday at the park I tried practicing my handstands without a wall or a tree- I even got a few friends to try with me at the end of the day. I can't balance for too long, but I am definitely understanding more and more what areas need to be activated, how that feels, and how it all ties into balance. It's so fun- there's always something to learn in yoga.

Due to yesterday being the 4th of July and all, I figured I could allow myself one day completely away from the lovely glow of my computer screen. So today's entry in another combo entry, but this time I think it works out appropriately.

Yesterday's class was one of two classes the studio held during the holiday, and because of the 30 day challengers it was packed. Feet were in faces, sweaty arms were constantly bumping each other, your neighbors breathing sounded like it was right next to your ear… I LOVE classes like that. Seriously. I always feel like there is so much energy in the room that it has to be a good time, and really no one can take themselves seriously when they're doing chaturanga into someone else's feet. Not to mention you have to get comfortable with one another- your space is going to get invaded and you gotta get comfortable with that, because the plus side is then you get to make friends.

Classes like that also require a lot of focus, which is something I'm not sure I realized until yesterday. The whole point is still to have a breathing/moving meditation with yourself in the company of others, so allowing the presence of the people around you to become secondary and not become a distraction is key. But that's tough when you're constantly worrying if you're going to accidentally hit the person next to you.

Tonight's class on the other hand was HOT- even hotter than the room with 30 or so people in it from yesterday. I haven't been in a room that hot since Bikram LES (or at least that's how I felt!), and surprisingly I totally dug it. There is a whole other challenge that comes up with heat, and it requires full mental control (or release depending on how you look at it) . I found at one point in the class that I really wanted to give up, but when I took a knee I realized I was breaking not because my heart was racing out of control, I couldn't find my breath, or I was feeling nauseous, but because I had literally just thought to myself "No way can I do this right now." But I totally could! The only thing stopping me was that I didn't think I could. So I took a deep breath and refocused. And for the rest of the flow series that's what I concentrated on. No mind, no thoughts, nothing. Just deep, long inhales and exhales. Feeling my heart pounding and feeling myself calming it with every breath and movement. And that's what yoga is about, and it was amazing.

The major lesson I learned between these two classes was a personal one. Yesterday's class I would normally consider rather "easy". It wasn't hot, the flow was relatively moderate, and we were given a pretty fair amount of breaks. However I also don't consider that I personally did "well" in that class. My breathing was uneven, it was hard for me to concentrate, and I definitely didn't push myself as much as I know I could have. 

Tonight's class however, I would definitely consider "hard" but I also feel I personally did really "well" and I believe it was because I was forced to concentrate because of the heat and it was easier because of there were fewer people in the room. Granted we all have our good days and bad days, and yesterday just could have been a bad day, but I also think that when I am given a certain type of challenge I will automatically want to live up to it, while when I'm given another kind of challenge I won't know what to do with it. But each class will present a different of challenge, and it's entirely up to me to face that challenge when it comes and get through it the best way I can, no matter the circumstances. Because that's what life is about, and when you do get through challenges you feel amazing.


So to make a long two days short (not really) that's been my double daily yoga dose. And as for my personal inversion challenge, day 4 and 5 were pinchmayurasana/forearm stand and a standard shoulder stand. The good news is I'm getting much better at my pincha!! Wall shmall, I'll straighten this sucker out in no time ;)